FAQs on Pronoun use

Pronouns are the shorthand words we use to refer to someone without explicitly calling them by their name.

• “Jordan noticed the beautiful weather, so she took her bicycle to work today.”
• “Since Amit’s final exams were over, they decided to stop by their favorite bakery to celebrate.”

It is not necessary to use pronouns as you can always refer to someone by name or profession (ex: “Coach” or “Professor”). In fact, assuming which pronouns someone uses may be inaccurate and harmful when considering pronouns often imply gender identity. Pronouns can be masculine (he, him and his), feminine (she, her and hers), or gender neutral (they, them and theirs, among others).

While the use of gender neutral pronouns is increasing in the United States¹, the Merriam-Webster dictionary reports that the singular they/them/theirs has been used since the early 1300s². Although in no way exhaustive, you can find a list of commonly used pronouns below³.

Just like our names, pronouns are extensions of our identities as human beings. Choosing not to use someone’s correct pronouns can be as insensitive and offensive as calling someone by the wrong name. Conversely, referring to someone by their correct name and pronouns demonstrates a respect for that person’s identity and wellbeing.

For individuals who are transgender, non-binary, gender fluid, or non-conforming, being referred to by the wrong name or pronouns can be more than just an annoying or embarrassing experience. In fact, affirming one’s identity through the use of an individual’s chosen name has been shown⁴ to reduce the risk of depression and suicidal behaviors in transgender youth.

The best way to learn someone’s pronouns is to ask them! One’s pronouns shouldn’t be assumed, may not match their gender expression, and may change over time. People may also choose to use a variety of pronouns. If you’d like to learn someone’s pronouns, you can lead by example and share your pronouns first during introductions. For example, you may say, “My name is Elijah. I use he/him/his pronouns.” This provides an invitation and creates space for others to share theirs. In a classroom setting or in a meeting, people can provide their pronouns as they go around the room and introduce themselves. Outside of the introduction setting, you can also simply ask, “What are your pronouns?” or “What pronouns do you use?”. With practice, this becomes routine. If you don’t know someone’s pronouns and would like to refer to them, it is best to call them by their name.

As members of the health care community, it is necessary that we educate ourselves about, respect and acknowledge the identities of our colleagues and the patients in our care. There is evidence that transgender and nonbinary medical students face barriers during their training, including witnessing stigmatizing and discriminatory care of transgender and nonbinary patients⁵. Transgender patients face multiple barriers in seeking medical care, including fear of discrimination⁶. Eliminating these barriers to care is necessary to address health disparities in this population⁷. In a national survey⁸, 50% of transgender individuals reported the need to educate their doctors on transgender healthcare. This is something that can be directly addressed and prevented by training the next generation of healthcare professionals⁹.

Mistakes happen, and though it can be embarrassing to realize you’ve accidentally referred to someone using the wrong pronoun, it’s important to consider how embarrassing it can be to experience being misgendered, especially in a group setting.

If you realize that you’ve accidentally used the wrong pronouns when referring to or addressing someone, consider apologizing as you would if you had accidentally called someone by the wrong name. If you’ve been in this situation before, you’ve probably learned that it’s best to acknowledge the mistake and to move on as quickly and graciously as possible.

Consider wearing a pin, sticker or other item that shares your pronouns, which serves as a sign of support. Pronoun pins from DAC are available in the Yale School of Medicine DICE Office in the Sterling Hall of Medicine. Including your pronouns in your Zoom display name and/or in your email signature are also excellent ways to normalize the use of pronouns in everyday interactions. Yale University students can also set their pronouns in the Yale Student Information System. Instructions for doing so are available on the University Registrar’s Office website under Gender Policy and Use.